School can create a highly charged emotional environment not only for children with Asperger’s Syndrome, but for their families as well.
Many families feel like they are falling between the cracks of the system.
Aspie’s are too high functioning for a “special school" but are often not able to cope with the mainstream school system either, due to issues like bullying, slow processing abilities or anxiety.
Although many people with Asperger’s Syndrome are above average intelligence, (some are even savants), the system itself does not cater for their specific brand of thinking.
It is easy for a parent to fall into “fight mode”, feeling as though they have to fight for the rights of their children in the school system.
Even though we all want what is best for our children, parents can often do more harm than good.
No one wants to be the parent the school dreads!
The reality is, you and your school are a team and you have to be able to work together to reach the best outcomes for your child with Asperger’s Syndrome.
Some great tips for supporting your teachers are:
Suggest teacher courses:
To help teachers understand Asperger's Syndrome and make the classroom better for everyone.
To help teachers understand Asperger's Syndrome and make the classroom better for everyone.
In Australia, I recommend: www.suelarkey.com
Start a communication book:
Both you and your teacher jot brief notes everyday. You’ll be amazed at how much it helps by letting each other know details from home and school, like if your child had a good nights sleep or not, if they struggled or did well with work or socialization or if they are having a particularly Autistic day (sometimes for no reason). All information helps. Just keep it short and to the point.
Email:
If you and your teacher are more technically savvy start a communication email system instead of the communication book above.
Plastic envelope in bag:
I keep an A4 plastic envelope with a velcro latch in my son's bag for notes and other communications with the school. That way he can hand it to the teacher or to me and is less likely to lose little bits of paper. (You can keep the communication book in there too!)
Make appointments:
See school staff at regular intervals that suit you both, to stay on top of potential problems. Always ask what you can do to help the school help your child.
See school staff at regular intervals that suit you both, to stay on top of potential problems. Always ask what you can do to help the school help your child.
Write to the Minister for Education:
If you see problems in the school system, write to or lobby your local member or even better, your Minister for Education.
Let your teachers know you appreciate them.
Have a great new term with your team… and remember, stay calm, stay kind and stay tuned for more mokas posts!
you are such an amazing mother-we need to get this stuff out to everyone- you are such a voice for ash and all these kids...
ReplyDeletebig hugs to you xxxxxxxxxx
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteMOKAS (MOKWAS) is SOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It Has inspired Me so much.
Thank you the god of Blogs.
These are excellent tips for building a positive and effective relationship with your school.
ReplyDeleteI remember the first meeting I had with our school in the year before Oscar was starting. They asked me what I wanted, what I expected from them. I told them I did not expect them to perform miracles. That I did not expect him to suddenly start talking, writing and reading at the level of his peers. That what I did want was Oscar to feel safe and happy. For his teachers to be a part of our team helping Oscar be the best he could be, whatever that may be.
You should have seen their collective shoulders drop.
Often those 'in the system' who seem the most reticent to help our children 'fit in' and succeed are those most fearful of failing as a teacher. They see the performance and progress of their students as a reflection of themselves, so when they have a child that does not respond and progress like a 'normal' child they tend to freeze/protest/freak-out.
Having those open communication systems in place go so far to lessening the difficulties you can experience.
Listen to me, so opinionated today.